Yeah, I'm weird

…Sometimes I wish I were arboreal. You ever have that? Probably not. I do though. Granted, it might be better to wish for more pertinent things, like not being nearsighted or, y’know, having a job but it is nevertheless something I occasionally wish. It just seems like it would be nice to able to easily climb up trees and swing around in the branches, take leaps from one to another… Now, you might say that I should just go outside, climb a freaking tree and get it out of my system. I would probably respond with some clever (or possibly quite lame) remark about not being familiar with the “freaking” genus of tree or something like that. Anyways. Speaking of jobs, I sometimes wish that life were more sci-fi and that there actually was a large job market for space explorers. That’d be pretty sweet. I mean, we’re not gonna find much I suppose, but as long as I’m wishin’ here, it could be a little more like Star Trek, although maybe not with every alien race looking like a dude with some rubber on his forehead. I also occasionally wish that zombies were real. Not rampant, but just kinda around. I mean, under what other circumstances would it be acceptable to carry around a shotgun and a broadsword and put them to use on a somewhat regular basis? Really, I just want a conscience-clean reason to go hack stuff with a sword and engage in some stress-relieving gunplay. At this point, you’re probably just going to look at me funny and try and change the subject. Or leave. Either way. If you were especially cool and clever you would remark, “If wishes were horses, we’d all be eating steak” at which point I would commend you for your Firefly reference and then go searching for some steak. Man though…that would be pretty sweet…swinging through the trees of some foreign world I’m exploring…cutting down the zombies that are chasing me through the forest after having tracked down our ship…dude, I should write this down. A little work and I’ve got myself a bread-winning sci-fi franchise of some kind. Or at least some half-written story ideas that I can shove on a shelf somewhere. That’s good too.





Man, now I really want some steak.