An Oldie
Well, as promised, here's the next poem for y'all. This one's over a year old (the one exception to my many year dry spell). So, yeah, take a look, see if'n ya like it, and then I'll let you know what I think of it afterwards:
In the deepest darkness of the night
I turn up my eyes and behold the stars.
Never quenched by blackness, ever light
They breathe hope upon new pains and old scars.
Each silent witness to the ages
So marvellous, shards of ice in the sky.
Beyond Earth's riches, Heaven' wages
They pale to the love in my brother's eye.
More than even all these stars combined
Are God's children images of His heart.
At the Father's table we have dined
And we each reflect His glory in part.
-2/5/04
Yeah, like I said, an old one. I like this guy, but looking back at him he seems too structured and forced even. I wish I had kind of just been able to let it flow more. I actually wrote the thing one night because I started thinking back to War Cry '03 and the stuff that happened there. I have one very vivid memory of standing on the steps leading up to the stage and looking back out across the auditorium and seeing over 400 youth lost in passionate worship. It was one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen.
In the deepest darkness of the night
I turn up my eyes and behold the stars.
Never quenched by blackness, ever light
They breathe hope upon new pains and old scars.
Each silent witness to the ages
So marvellous, shards of ice in the sky.
Beyond Earth's riches, Heaven' wages
They pale to the love in my brother's eye.
More than even all these stars combined
Are God's children images of His heart.
At the Father's table we have dined
And we each reflect His glory in part.
-2/5/04
Yeah, like I said, an old one. I like this guy, but looking back at him he seems too structured and forced even. I wish I had kind of just been able to let it flow more. I actually wrote the thing one night because I started thinking back to War Cry '03 and the stuff that happened there. I have one very vivid memory of standing on the steps leading up to the stage and looking back out across the auditorium and seeing over 400 youth lost in passionate worship. It was one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen.
posted by Benzoid the Destroyer at 12:50 PM
5 Comments:
I love the poem. you're really good at poetry Ben, I especially liked the first stanza or whatever it's called.
and oh, the good old Romania massage lines. what could be better. esepcially if you're in front of the right ppl.
It's nice... a little sructured, but I think you do the structured flowing thing well, as well as the free verse... since so few people are doing structure right now...
You could probably write some good sonnets... I hereby commission thee to write thee sonnets...
i know what you mean about flowing. it's not always the easiest thing to do, but it seems to me like you've improved quite a bit since then...
Thanks y'all. You're all great at giving me those warm fuzzy feelings.
Oh, and I actually do have a sonnet lying around somewhere I can post for ya George. I Shakesperean sonnet at that.
Wow, "I Shakesperean Sonnet at that". Aren't I articulate. It's not like the "i" key is about as far away from the "a" key as you can get or anything...
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